Published in the November 1997 issue of the Dallas/Ft. Worth Unix Users Group newsletter.

Once you have variables named "foo" and "bar", what should the next one be? What comes after "quux"? Under what circumstances is it necessary to wave a dead chicken over your program? These and other crucial questions are answered in the bible of hackerdom - The New Hacker's Dictionary, third edition (TNHD). The information therein is also distributed online as the "Jargon File".

One of the blurbs on the back cover of the book says that it "...is not for skimming. Allot, each day, a half hour, severely timed if you hope to get any work done." I can remember my first exposure to the Jargon File. I had learned of it from the alt.folklore.computers newsgroup. I grabbed a copy of the on-line version, and didn't have the benefit of that admonition on the cover of the book. I started into it and had a hard time putting it away - I squirreled away many lunch hours reading through this dictionary from front to back.

The entries in TNHD and the accompanying articles are steeped in the hacker tradition. If you've read any of the classic hacker novels such as Hackers (or any of the others mentioned in TNHD's bibliography), you'll recognize many of the entries. There are also close ties to the Internet - "This book was put together almost entirely through the net." (TNHD, page xiv). Many of the terms defined come from Usenet culture (see the entries for YKYBHTLW and kiboze, for example).

It's interesting to note that the book is categorized at the Library of Congress under "Electronic data processing--Terminology--Humor", "Computers--Humor", and "Computers--Slang--Dictionaries", in that order. It's not that TNHD is a parody, it's just that the hacker culture itself embodies a lot of humor. By the way, see the entries for "feep" and "feeping creaturism" to see why I named my workstation "feep".

If you're not up to reading the book from one end to the other, be sure to read the forewords, introductions, and appendices. Measure your age by seeing whether you or anyone you work with knows someone like Mel, the Real Programmer. And make sure you never confuse the true meanings of the terms "hacker" and "cracker".

The New Hacker's Dictionary, compiled by Eric S. Raymond; with foreword and cartoons by Guy L. Steele, Jr. 3rd ed. Cambridge, Mass.: MIT Press, 1996. 547 pages. Most of the contents available as the on-line Jargon File version 4.0.0. Available online at... now wait a minute, first you have to promise to seriously consider buying a copy of the book. It's cheap, after all.... The Jargon File is available online via ftp at prep.ai.mit.edu in pub/gnu/jarg400.txt.gz, and also see jargon-README. You may also be able to find an html version on the web.

Hint on the first two opening questions - these terms are all "metasyntactic variables". Amaze your friends when you learn the proper sequence and the high-falutin' term for them. :-)